I've been struggling with life since Marty started working. Initially, I tried to do everything all at once to keep the house going, and of course, that trick never works for very long. I wore myself out fast. I've never been very good at pacing myself, and routine has always been a struggle. This last weekend was an extra long one, because Marty has been sick from work since Thursday and after a trip to the Doctor, he's been resting at home for 4 days straight. It's been awesome having him home! I feel like we both got a break, a proper rest and some quality sleep.
We ate breakfast in the morning sun, taking our time and relaxing. I found a little mantid that we've never seen before, and probably never will, unless it explores the pink shopping bag again!
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| Spot the mantid |
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| This mantid! |
It rained all night last night and is still raining this morning. It's the most wonderful gentle consistent rainfall we've had in a very very long time. My gauge says 30mm, but I honestly haven't checked it for months now. A combination of forgetfulness, having other things (far too many other things!) on my mind, and any rain we did get has been too light to be excited by.
As for me, I'll keep trying my best to get things done, and even though I get frustrated and angry with myself, constantly loosing focus, forgetting why I came into a room or what I was doing, I guess I have to keep in mind that everything I do get done is "better than it was", and as long as I keep plodding along, we'll get there eventually. It's a very long and winding road, in a thick fog, a severe lack of signage and my GPS seems to be wonky! Then again, it seems like I spend more time off-road in the rocky dirt and sticky mud, than on it.
Marty is feeling better and back at work this week and I miss him already.
It's hard, slogging it out at home, alone. You have to be your own motivator, and goal-setter. A good slogan I read recently, was just get through the next step. It was in relation to feeling overwhelmed, or paralysis. By concentrating on the next step, you don't have to contemplate the bigger picture. And often, that one step, is enough to apply your energy too.
ReplyDeleteI think this comes with acreage living. Everything is so much bigger, and we're so much smaller - walking out of the convenience of suburbia, which does everything to convince us living should be easy, with just the right planning. Acreage doesn't work like that. It has it's own process, we need to learn to manage.
I am very impressed with you industriousness and progress. You have achieved a lot in the time that you have been there and I can see it and admire it even if you are sometimes having trouble seeing it. You'll get there but it takes time and resources (money and energy are resources) that sometimes we don't have. Advice from an older person (me) would be to snooze when you need to and sit back and look and rest and think when you need to as doing that is important as well as working flat out all of the time.
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